My Own Outer Limits


It occurs to me that all around me is a quivering mass of opportunity waiting to be exploited. It is so hard to step out of your mind and taste what’s real. So much fear, anxiety, and ennui. What gives? Every once in a while, I feel like I am 10 years old again, and filled with fun, laughter, and wonder. Then a few seconds later, I feel like I’m 65, and contemplating the least painful way to climb out of my chair, and walk into the kitchen. It is so farrrr away!! Help me.
So this is what it’s like after you’ve grown up?

I just posted the above on Facebook, on my Wall. (I don’t like calling it the Wall, reminds me of walls where people get shot to death by firing squad, or the Berlin Wall, maybe Pink Floyd’s Wall, none of them fun places.) Those thoughts got me to thinking about how amazingly flexible our consciousness is. If you really take a look in there, there is more going on that you could ever hope to write about in a thousand years. I mean, if you fully examine it, our consciousness is unbelievably vast and surprisingly impersonal. There is a part of me that could care less about whether I lose my job, whether I feel good or not, if I’ll win the lottery, the list goes on. That part is an ever expanding sea of impressions, audio, video, and even tactile impressions. Go ahead! Just be quiet and take a look inside. At first your thoughts are there, and boy are they loud. They crowd out everything else, but if you can look really closely, you notice other things going on as well., and the interesting thing is that it has nothing to do with you. At least, not the you that you are usually aware of. I’m not sure what all that is about. Maybe it’s just your brain doing it’s thing, or maybe it is the universe doing it’s thing. Maybe it is a portal to a whole other ballgame, not even in this universe at all. Sometimes, when I am starved for inspiration, like now, I can dip in there and pull out something unexpected which allows me to step off the treadmill of my mind for a bit. Otherwise it is the same tired old drone of the anxious mind.

I would like to think that when I die I simply dive deep into that sea of information and make a little home for myself. I might even have a few visitors, In fact, I’m sure of it. It is nice to think about, but it is what it is, not what I wish it could be. But you know what? I think the big unspoken secret is that nobody really knows what the fuck is going on. And for some reason a lot of us think we will know after we die. But it is possible that we might be just as clueless then. Maybe it is up to us to make it all up. Perhaps God depends on us as much as we depend on God. You see how I can create my own Outer Limits? Don’t adjust your computer, it is only one mind infecting another with all kinds of possibilities. For me, that is a lot more exciting than all of the world’s religions and philosophies combined. Who wants an answer when you can have such beautiful questions?

Stay young. Stay aware. There is so much more to share.

(I can hardly believe that I got through this post without being my usual sarcastic self, I guess that part of me was taking a little break, God knows it needs it!)

2 responses »

  1. I swear I wasn’t trippin’ when I wrote that. I haven’t done that in thirty years! But it sort of reads like something a pothead would write. I’m a little embarrassed by it. What the hell was I trying to say? It reminds me of Marvin Gaye singing “Everthing is everthing!” What? But, hey, I don’t think I’m greedy and gluttonous. But then, I have always been poor, if I were to win the lottery, I might become that way, I sure hope not. But I see you’re point, I am a bit of a selfish bastard. As far as missing out on part of it, I think we miss most of it!! Most of our attention is on our own thoughts. We are hypnotized by our own existence. There is so much more than ourselves. I realize I’m preaching to the choir.
    Thanks for keeping up our little dialogue. This is what the web should be.

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